.
Down Day

It was an enthusiastic day in de beginning..prepared myslf for de interview and all. Went der and waited for de lady. SHe was OK...AT FIRST....b4 she went into more of de question. Though it was jus me n her....it is seriously miserable. Reminds me of de first interview i had last year...which also oni had one intrviewer..and so it is.

She was blabbering about me NOT having a degree...and there i had written down..at de form..my qualifications and yet she insisted dat I have NO degree. I was like...NO..i have a degree..a bach degree..and she say...No u dun..u oni have diploma. I dunno if she can even read lah ya. It took a few mmts...n i nearly wanted to take out my cert and show it to her...and den she eventualy say..oh ok. is it a bach of science...its nt right? i was like..YES IT IS. heart pain man..talking to her..and convincing her dat Im a degree holder. Do i look stupid to her dat she tinks im jus making up story??

That does nt end der....She blabber about why I have so many jobs listed. Told me dat I shdnt have even put dem at all....like no use. I kept telling her its a TEMP job...bt she jus dun get it. Ask me...y i kept changing jobs..i shd have stayed at de comp and wait for dem to change me into perm. SHe jus dun get it dat...its jus a TEMP admin at some random comp..i wldnt wan to spend my life at some comp which is totally not related. Haiz...n it was during sch days. She den so called compare me with her contractors...saying she used to hire contractors and make dem into perm and ask me to do de same too.

Her questions: Tel me wat u like abt ur current job...I ONLY wk der for 1 week! hw m i supposed to like a job within dat period?? and Ask me what i hated abt it...of coz, i dun wan to even bad mouthed de comp..and she jus dun seem satisfied. Told her...dat temp is diff.....its jus plainly admin. and she STILL dun get it. Ask me wat i had done aka achievement during my previous wk. AGAIN..i WORK TEMP! what proj did i do??! I jus type n update database. Haiz...its seriously heart break talking to smeone who jus dun undrstd. Blabber abt my previous jobs...

Den after she talk abt de main job scope..she looked..and ask..DO U THINK U ARE QUALIFIED to do dis? I was jus crapping ard. Seriously, i jus feel like going out of de room. it was a freaking LONG...40mins intrvw..which I dun even wan to go tru further. Anyway, she dun seem convinced wth my ans...all shwn to her face. N i knew im OUT. hah~! Wen i ask her when de result will be..she told me dat there are a few she need to c. It all dpds...coz she wan to c...someone who can reali do dis job. bla3....nwys, me also da tawar hati.

To be honest, It was de first time dat i seriously feel so down...hah..even teared up a lil wen i went out frm dat building. DUn ask me why. maybe its like...indirectly kutuk me or smthing. Haizzz....emo day for me, i supposed. Hope i dun get such crappie intrviews...PLZZZZZZZZ.....

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Fast come Fast go

And so like most of u have known...last Thursday..Got a call from an agency and I started wrking on de next day itslf. Was very happy althgh it was a temp admin wk. The first day was fine...got to knw my supp n manager..and dey start giving me wk. Updating directories n all dat. It was jus a simple data entry wk and so on...typical admin job. Ok. Den eventually all know dat Im a grad...and dats wen my supp say..Oh, dis thing wld be much easier for u den. But on de first day itslf, i had already had a dateline to do. So had to do de wk fast n catch up with de databse function n all. There were 2 malay gerls jus beside me...BUT..dey arent frenly...and I was left alone..during lunch. But nvm...i ended up fasting on dat day n de following day.

Den IT began..my supp began to give me de main case...and I tot it was jus helping out...BUT she ended up asking me to take over one of de case...liase with de company and send out de invoices and all WITHOUT her checking on my wk. So its like...I will directly submit my stuff to dem. Hah~! N all i knw is jus a BASIC outline of de whole thing. Dat does nt end der...one of de malay gerl KEPT asking me to print out her stuffs...and IM NOT EVEN UNDER HER. like hello~! My supp had to mengalah..and alwys say..Ok. N having a BIG printer and MANY ppl using it..and changing letterheads accordingly...MAKE me alwys had de wrong paper printed. N it took like FOREVA to print one single file....NO wonder she pass it to me! Hmph~!

Da bagi org buat....den evryone kept asking me if i had finished de wk..like evry single hour. Like hello..im jus here like de 2-3days..U cant expect me to do dat fast...until i even say..to my supp. IM NOT A ROBOT...i cant do dat fast. N having to do de job..which de perms are doing and Im having oni 700bucks to bring back homey...dun tink its even wrth. Its like im handling de main job...and b4 dat finished...i was given anther case. haiz...Penat.

It is even worst wen ur 'neighbours'..de malay gerls DUN EVEN TALK TO YOU. its like dey have their own clan..and im a loner. I tel u...i tink ppl wking in de library is NOT as quiet as me. I practically DIN TALK at all.....unless my phone ring. Its like..de env is sooo UNWELCOMING. ANd so...aftr tinking many times and get many opinions..decided to tender..one wk notice.Seriously cant tahan working der...NO LIFE. n i cant even go out to de toi....w/o getting lock outside coz NO card to enter. So i had to go toi like during lunch. Pathetic. No rest langsung..and MANY EYES are looking at u.

The first time being a temp and had to go for a meeting too. N i seriously had NO idea wat dey are talking abt. My supp was surprised..bt i had my own reason to quit. Den its like 'finding fault' day...coz ystrday she lend me her calculator..and I oni use it 3times..and eventually dat calculator was spoilt tday. N my supp ask...wat i had done to de calculator..coz after she lend to me...it became like dat. LIKE HELLO....told her..I dun even know..it doesnt drop or wat~ Den she went..Ok..nvm. Hmph! Jus one time, borrow...den spoil..den blame.

The otr 2 malay gerls are so TOTALLY not in my league...coz we dun talk..and dey oni talk amg thmslves..abtt their lives...bla3x. EAch day wen i go back...went to their table and salam. Tu pon..dorang cam tak hulur de hand first. Not like de normal peeps..Den jus nw...wen its their turn to go back hme first..Dey din even tegur me AT ALL...dey talk to the frens at de back..and went off...JUS BESIDE ME who is SITIING der. LIke...as soon as i turn..dey went off...LIKE DAT.

Hah! SO......since next wk is my last wk..Im sooo gonna take my time doing my wk...and gona ignore dem totally! Like...dun btr to tegur dem lar..anymore...wen i wan to go back. Malas....de past wk..been alwys iye iye nak make fren..bt dey totally malas nak layan u. cam u are some kid! Nwys, yap....gt a job cepat...gonna quit also cepat. heheh..takpela...sure ade some jobs out der for me....lets pray in dis bulan ramadhan..insyaALLAH....terkabul...AMIIINNN~

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The day

And so..de first day came. It was pretty alright...though had to write down de ways to handle the database. Plus had to do as much as i can...since my supp had a meeting on Wed, so need to do it asap. BUT...haha..im jus doin wat i can do. NO hurry2. hahahah...The people der are OK. Maybe coz still new...so thy dun reli layan u. But anywys....will oni be der for 3 mths...so its ok. Even msg up my fren who work at de nearby building to go lunch with me...since im a loner. HAHAHA~!

Still looking for otr jobs....and hpfully by de time my contract ends...i have a perm job or smthing. This is jus for experience..since de salary is little. heheh..even little den my previous wk..which have a 4digit number.hahaha...minus dis n dat...save setotet jer. So..lets see..wats up. Coz Even if de comp were to re-contract back....I have to finish de contract...and cant wk else where. so...pray dat i can get a Perm job sooon~~ :D

my ONLY stationery on dat day...

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Tday...went to Spore expo..with Mom. Hahah...like smgt like dat...we actuali took public transport...since Dad have nt yet come home frm wk. And so we went....got a small IT show, Metro sale and the Malay food expo. Annnd.....I got a new pair of sandals!! hahaha..best...and get to eat my TAKOYAKI. yumyum...terima kasih, mak n abah~! Haha..mom says...i shd have bought de sandals myslf since i alredy start wk. HAHAHAHA...yela tu....baru kerja satu hari...gaji pon lum dpt. hahahaha... :P

Hmmm...Hadnt been talking much with Ayg lately. Been busy wth his wk and all....and by de time, he's back...im already asleep. hu hu~ His new job scope...is seriously busy to de max. So, hoping der is a lil fwee2 time smewhere for us.

okiess......off mode~~~

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Unexpected

And so...de day had come as per normal..as I tot so. Went for an interview at dis agency..which i had gone for previously. To be honest, wasnt reali enthusiastic..coz i knew im nt goin to get any jobs like on de spot...and i had to wait for anther few wks or so. But ya, went...and all...Told de lady...dat I wld take any Temp jobs if available. bla3x...Went back after dat...Gt a few calls frm her asking if im interested in dis n dat...

Den in evening..abt 5pm, She called back...asking if im fine with the temp admin position at Tamp (biomedical sector). I was like..Ok..den she ask if i can start work tmrw. N i was like..huh? reali?...oh ok..can. Hah~! Ask me to come to sign contract on dat evening as well...which obviously I CANT..since im on my way to fetch Mom. So, gonna go to de agency...tmrw after wk.

Yap, even though...its just a temp admin wk, guess....can increase a lil of my income and alil exp. At least can save a lil money up..plus its very near my house..so minus de transport fare. hehee...ALHAMDULLILAH. Syukur... :D

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SHE was sad...the night b4..
Tears kept running down her cheeks..
And eventually SHE cried till SHE slept..
BUT SHE was alil alright the day after..
HE called HER up to mit..
Even wen HE was extremely Tired..
Coz HIS heart was so restless about HER..

THEY talked...
SHE cried again...SHE was not angry
SHE was just feeling DOwn..
HE took HIS hands on HER face...
Looked into HER eyes and Say THE WORD...

HE tried to cheer HER up...
SHE eventually smiled...
HE wanted to give HER a pink rose...but to no avail..NO pink rose FOUND. hah!!
SHE still rmbr HE used to give her Rose..those days
When HE upsets HER...as in A REAL issue..

SHE says 'its ok'
SHE just knew HE wld come to her and soften her heart...
And make HER feel better...
SHE thanked GOD...for having HIM as HER fiance..

Though problems and crisis occur...
SHE was glad THEY alwys try to work on IT...
ALhamdullilah...it stays dat way. :)

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Reduced Self-esteem

She was normally Ok with being called as IT
But then guess yestrday, it was HER sensitive moment
When She read about IT...
She felt really down...as in REALLY sad..
Hah~ She shouldnt even be feelin dat though since it was the fact..
Maybe it wasnt DAT bad with the closed ones...
But then again..IT struck Her hard..
She had to do somthing...

It doesnt help when She couldnt speak Her mind with HIM dat night...
He was on reservist the whole week...
And by the time He is back...He just gonna flat
Though She was a lil relieved wen She heard HIS voice in the evening...
Guess, Evryday...She had to hear HIS voice..or She just felt restless...
and THAT mmt was Ystrday...
Lucky it wasnt THE WHOLE DAY with NO voice... :)

She still felt down...
Ended up..msg Him up about how She was feeling about the IT thngy...
Though She knew He had slept...

However, She woke up in the morning...
Checked her hp..and saw an sms from HIM...
The words...made Her morning...
Short but meaningful.....
For He loves Her for WHO She is....
Thank YOU.....

She smiled..... :)

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Long way to go...

Oh! Few more weeks and its Puasa mth!! Hoho....I have yet to bayar hutang soon. Shd be starting dis wk. wheee!! Cant wait for puasa though..BUT at the same time, dun reali feel the raya celebration coz guess....There is NO place to go except my aunt place..since bth my grdparents are nt ard anymore. Will surely miss dem on de first day itslf. Oh!! N this year...baju raya is gonna be GREEEENN...actuali jus recycle frm my Bro's wedding. hahaha...

Met up with Ayg ystrday...hah...n jus realise that he wont be able to mit me up...in dis few days. Due to his wk schduele n stuffs....n nxt wk is his reservist wk and the wk after is his evening shift..and we dun mit up during dat shift...AAAANNNDDD....dat means 3 wks NOt meeting up!! Hu hu~ But hope able to slot a lil time somewhere..b4 starting of puasa though. endureeeee~!!! Shd make myslf busy2 bee too.. hahah...lalalallala~~~

Yeah...got a lil Bonus too dis month!! Thank you ( u know who u r)....Sooo...wanna do a lil shop2...first up wanna buy sandals and the rest..tgk la ape yg nak dibelikan nanti. hahah...best!

Update...wen this is stuffs..OFF MODE

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Half a Year

Guess...IT had been getting on to me. Hmm...What is 'IT'?. It is de JOB...which I reali had been waiting for. Yes...ppl kept hearing me complain abt dis...bt I myslf dun even wan to tink of it sooo much and trying to jus ignore dis topic evry time it is discussed. So now...yet again...Im gonna be silent and wait. seriously HOPING there is something for me out der. InsyaALLAH...Ok, enough talking abt dis. Tired of hearing and Tired of talking abt dis. :P

Oh, besides dat...Ayg's bday was celebrated nicely last wkend..with LOTS of walking ard n did a lil shop2 for me n him. Tot of treating him lunch..bt he managed to get to e counter FIRST to pay it. Hmph! Luckily...managed to buy him a T-shirt he chose and like. Nice...had a great time with him dat day..plus gt de thing which I reali reali reali wanted too~!! wheee~!!! Sungguh happi sekali. haha~!

Hmmm....been counting downs and imagining and planning and lots more....to THAT day. Exciting for US...since I had been waiting for dat day to arrive and so called have a lil more freedom in what im doin. JUST A LIL TINY WINY freedom. hehehe...nwys, no harm in day-dreaming of stuffs, rite? hahah.. as long as its within ur capability n all. Wateva it is....hope Next year is gonna be an interestng year for Us...and some of our close palz tooo.. :)

Okies...off mode...

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Busy Busy

Had been waking up very early these days...accompanying Mom to settle off my late grdmtr's stuffs. From the Syariah court to de bank to de lawyer..on 3 days straight. phew~ Very tiring. N more have yet to come. Guess..its gona be a LONG process b4 evrything is settled. Yap..dat LOT. hah! But nvm, as long as im nt wking yet..gonna accompany..if nt, guess its gonna be jus Mom n dad.

Ystrday, went over to Spore expo..dunno why its like SOOOOO pack to de MAX. like seriously. Went over to de ROBISONS sale..and was shocked to c de QUEUE..its like soooo damn long which ends half of de whole expo hall. SO ended up jus glanced tru and went off. Headed to the Wedding Expo..which as USUAL...NOTHING much. Its like de same old thing with very little wedding exhibition. I stil dun get it..wen dey make a big HU HA out of it..and yet de wedding compartment oni consist of 1/4 of de whole thing. Nwys, It was jus a scan tru...plus i tink de best period to go is during the MEGA WEDDING EXPO..if nt, i dun tink its much.

Hmm...Oh, Ayg's bday is coming sooonn! Great...no idea to buy anything, so maybe jus go for a TREAT outside. Seriously OUT of idea. Plus not going out on his actual day...since its famolie time...plus falls on de 10th july which is a SATURDAY. so....nvm...be a late or early celebration den. hehe..n he can even asked me "HOW OLD IS HE?" hah! leh gitu....old man alweady larrr

This wkend...goin to our fren's wedding...heading out in de morning since her solemnization starts at 11am..and its a ONE DAY event. wheee~!! cant wait....to c her. N wats best..she jus lived one bus stop away frm my place. hahaha...VERY DE NEAR la...

Hmmm...hoping to hear something Nice dis week..I HOPE. :)

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Publicity?? hmmm...

Just stating out my views...sometimes i just wonder is FB a gateway to publicise EVRY SINGLE THING of ur life? I mean...its find to state out...what u are doing, experiencing...and all dat. Lovey dovey and all dat. BUT sometimes, certain things are better to left alone and NOT to publicise to EVRYONE though i knw its YOUR FB...so its ur own biz to show wat u want. Im not anti with those who had shown their love and all to their otr halfs...coz I did dat sometimes.

But I just cldnt stand ppl who even publicise YOUR ARGUMENTS in FB. Are u for real? like Seriously?? I mean...dats is for ur own self to knw. NOT telling de world..dat U bth are arguing and kept commenting n writing at each otr walls. HAH~! Ppl judge u by dat...de way u even talk to ur gf/bf....de way u show ur anger..asking One to shut up and yet de otr half is saying SORI SORI and SORI~!! And with de reason stated der...hah! it even more pathetic.

Nwys, jus stating out wat i think. Wateva it is, its their own wall....and we are just der to read wateva things are written down. Jus dat...its kinda weird...to c such drama mama. But anywys...dats LIFE. -_-

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One Year Had passed

Pejam celik..pejam celik..its already A YEAR. That is how fast the time had gone tru. Alhamdullilah, we had gone tru the one year smoothly. Though arguments and fights do exist..hehe (mcm, wrestling lak...fights. heheh), Im glad we managed to pull it tru all dat. And I knw that there are still much things to encounter ahead...which wil mainly need our understanding and respect for each otr. And ppl alwys say...engagement had a lot of dugaan....from the wedding preparation to the understanding of each otr needs n lots more. Though each couple wil have different dugaans....guess it stil dpds on each otr to make sure the bond is still der...and not let loose. InsyaALLAH....pray dat all will be fine. :)

And so...de time is ticking nearer and nearer AND NEARER. yesh...anther 1yr half...Like wat my family says....Its GONNA BE VERY FAST BEFORE YOU KNEW IT. N next year will be a busy year for me. whee~ Many things to be settled. Im glad dat some of dem are already booked...but many have yet to be bought and all. And Im glad to have find de ONE which i had been looking for. Nice~~ hehe.. Also glad to have my mom n dad to help me out with the preparations..also Abg n Kak Ima..and my besties. ( YOU GUYS ARE GONNA SOOOO HELP ME OUT NEXT YEAR!!!!). hehehe

Nwys, yestrday was the celebration day...had a Scrumptious meal at East coast..which lead to a VERY BONCIT me. hahaah...i seriously couldnt walk dat time...was SOOOO full. haha!! Plus Ayg told me..NEXT TIME..dun order TOMYAM soup coz i ended up NOT finishing it. Ooopzzz!! :P Just went around Geylang...and I got myself...3 selendangs!! Den jus driving around..Punggol yet again. hehe...to de site with NOTHING der! hahah...

Had a great time with Ayg...and Thanks Ayg for the Bag..luving it. N hope yu like de brownies I made...I knw IM NOT A BAKER....so had to do some..ready-to-bake brownies from de box. HAHA~ Happy 1st Anni...may our jodoh be berpanjangan hingga akhir hayat.. AMIN~ :D

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The awaited Weekend

Cant wait for dis Saturday to come...hmmm...maybe missing Ayg so much. Hadnt met him for a date since last mth. hah~! with his busy schdueles...work work work...and OT almost evryday. Guess, need to sacrifice de meetingz. Yap yap....i mean..after all, he is wking hard for us. Was actuali supposed to have an outing with Ayg n his parents but since his parents had to go to some family thingy in JB last minute...dey are unable to join in. Nwys, gonna help buy dem de stuffs dey plan to buy with us dat day. Wheee~~ I wasnt thinking of celebrating our engagement anni as in an OFFICIAL thingy...but since HE himslf wan to have a small celebration...WHY NOT??!! Dats somthing rare of Him...(hahah...pantang org ckap nak celebrate). N yesh...gonna have a lil celebration..and guess wat??? Me no hap present. hu hu~~ Nvm, shall look up for something.. :P

Oh, Im back with my exercise regime...after dunno hw long of STOPPING due to my sickness de past few weeks. hahaha....N dis time, its no longer running....just a simple 30mins walk evryday. So hoping dat helps A LOT. hahahah...seriously, Im getting fatter MAN....and My knees are hurting. Tu la...GEMOK sgt..sampai kaki pon sakit. hahahah...So its back to exercise~!! weeehhhooooo....

N im still craving for Rojak Mama~!! Hmph...very dissapointing, u knw. Ystrday, planned to eat rojak mama with bubble tea n all...and de shop is closed! Ape tak sedih. huhu~~ Hope able to get it soooon...yum yum..( cam mana ni nak kurus...if evrytime craving for fooooddd??!!!) hahaha....

Btw, wanna add smthing to my bestie Suzzie. Hope her grddad be ok soon..and may de doctor able to treat Him. InsyaALLAH....my prayers are for him..and May he get well and able to be discharged. I soo feel the worri-ness and all...therefore, do update me aite. *huggiezz*

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Events before and after

The past week was my SICK MODE week. Terrible stomach cramps..and high fever... Which evntually had to go up n down to CGH...for check ups and all..accompanied by Mom and Dad. Ayg was seriously worried..and im very touched wth de continuous msgs and all.. :D ...also Abg n kak ima. But alhamdullilah....recovered

from all dat...n im FINE now. Thnks guys for reali concerning abt me...at dat time. Also de besties...u knw who u are. :)

After de whole wk..of memerap kat rumah...eventually get to mit up with de CLANZ ystrday. A short meet up dinner..bt was a nice one. Sharing stories n all.....So called lepaskan windu to de gerls...reali miss out de giler giler ness....esp in sch. hah~!!!

Hmmm...cant wait for the next 2 wks. Gonna borrow dad's car..and so called be having a mini advanced anni engagement celebration..plus Bonus..plus dot dot dot. HAH~! Yeah....Ayg had already planned out where to go..and i wan to eat IKAN PARI BAKAR~~ Yum yum. hehhe... So cant wait for dat. N de day after our anni...heading to HDB...for some "autographs" by us. AHAHA.....cam artist gitu. LIKE REEEAALL~! Nwys...yeah...cant wait for dat...and its happening NEXT 2 WEEKS. wooo hooo~

And so I've heard...we getting de GST money dis july. $200~!!! So....hahaha..i knw wat im gonna do with it. SAVE it..for my wedding henna. HAHAHAHAH...cam pathetic gitu kan. HAHA...bt wat to do. Nvm...save one thing jer dulu. heheheh....tu pun..save oni half of it for dat. de rest...ENJOY. okie..maybe not. SAVE yati SAVE. *slap forehead*

Okies off now...wheee~~ N im in spamming mode still, you knw... :P

Meaningful...deep

Firstly, Im stuck with dis song (Hari Berganti)...De lirik is VERY meaningful. And was introduced by Ayg. Nice~~~ :D



" Hari berganti...Masa pun berlalu....
Semakin Teguh kasih dan sayangku....
Bersama berjanji Sesama Berkasih...
Kini detik waktu menjadi penentu
HAri Berganti...

Sayang, Akan ku terus sabar menanti
Hingga tiba masanya ku berinai di jari.... "

Our last meet up...ended up with a Kara-OK session. It was nice....i mean de company..NOT our voices. HAHAHA....we basically kept laughing due to my CARTOON VOICE. hahah...n our pitching were TERRIBLE la yar. Told Ayg...OH NO...IM sooooo gonna screw up if we are gonna sing during our wedding..SUARA tak leh angz! hahahah... *faints*

Overall, we did enjoyed ourslves...within de 5 hrs der! hahah..ya...n we ended up with sore throats and Im sick now. heheh..actually was gonna get sick last sunday..and it became worst yrstday. Seriously LEPAAAAKK. Was suppposedly to go JB tday...bt Dad told me...its cancelled since Im sick. hu hu~~ Yap yap...nwys me no energy to go out and shop2. sure Boring. hmph~

Oh...Have yet to meet up with my dearest frens...besties...MDIS clanz..NTUC income peeps. Haha...stil have to set a date and all....Been a loooooong time we last met. Guess will have to find a free date for all. So...shall wait for de day huh.

Hmmm.......wanna looooose my weight~!!!! ho ho....can i jus go to LONDON WEIGHT..and den pose at de newspaper wen im slimmer?? HAHAHAHAHAHA!! Maybe Mommy can sponsor a lil. hehehe... :P
Very tiring weneva i wan to start back my exercise routine...n im SICK. if not sick...asthma attack!!!

Okies off peepz.....

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Unexpected Twist

Yestrday....was a busy day. Went out in de morning....followed Mom n dad to settle de imp stuffs b4 headed off to My late grdmtr's house...to spring clean with my family, aunts..uncle and cuzzin. Though we oni managed to clean up...a LIL area....it was pleasing to be with de whole family. It was pretty much Ok...until we saw de pressie which was meant for my bro n kak ima on their wedding day. It had been quite awhile.....whre my grdmthr kept saying dat my late Grdftr had buy dem somthing and wrapped it with newspaper...but dey have nt taken it or even see it yet UNTIL ystrday. What was more touching was......it was NOT wrapped by newspaper...It was nicely wrapped with a Blue wrapping paper with heart balloons pictures and CONGRATULATIONS wordings. n was covered with newspaper at one corner....to prevent any dust collection. Haiz.....A very touching thingy. We din expect dat. He actuali went to buy and search for de special pressie and wrapped it nicely. Guess it will uncover some things which will touch de heart evrytime we come to clean de house....I MISS DEM. :)

Life is pretty much de same....Basically jus hanging out at home..and following mom n dad to places. A lot of "outings" sure will be needed in dis period of time.

Cant wait for de Movie date dis coming Wednesday. Been a while since we watched movie tgther.....i tink it had been more den half a year or so. And to be told...He had booked de tix. heheh...dats sooo different of him...coz he dun normally do dat. nice. Guess some things which are not being done in a normal routine and was done once in awhile....Unexpected But nice..A small thing done cld turn out pleasing in de eyes.... :)

Heading off........

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To be Loved...

Im blessed....To be loved...and surrounded by my dearest family, Ayg and dearest besties. The ones who had alwys been der for me...all this years...when Im happi, worried, sad and angry. hehe...Basically this post is specially for u guys.

My family....who alwys hear my rants and all..giving me advise and provide a listening ear. To have such a supportive family....Im reali blessed. Especially wen Im jobless and all, dey are not being persuasive and all.... i mean..i had done my part..so lets wait for rezeki to come. Also...abg and kak ima...who may nt be staying here...but Im alwys looking forward to dem coming to my place...updating dem with new stories and all. Just making me feel happi wen dey are present. Lots of laughters and all....basically all my worries and sadness will flush away...weneva dey come by. Nice~ :)

Ayang...who had been there basically in every thing i do. The one who had been VERY supportive in wat i do. N being a sensitive, lembik, stubborn fiancee I AM.....he seriously had de patience to entertain me. N i know....HE could bimbing me and all in future. We are not perfect couple....and Im glad we managed to see our imperfectness and try to change for de better...in every ways we can. N i alwys pray dat our jodoh akan berkekalan till de rest of our lives. AMIN~~

Besties....YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE....You guys are my LOVE. The ppl who knws wats going on with my life...the ppl who are there wen I realli need someone to talk to..and give me pendapat and all. Especially wen it comes to personal thingy....feels open to talk abt it to de ones Im seriously close with. N im glad dat in every topic we talked.....we sees in different perception and not onli sided to one party. UNLESS...its seriously OBVIOUS. hah! N yap......everytime...my heart feels a lil uncomfy or upset abt certain thing...u guys jus knw abt it...w/o me even telling it yet.

Therefore, here....i wanna thank GOD for giving me such wonderful ppl to be with. I realli appreciate wat you guys do.....all these years..and I wish de best for all of us...no matter wat...love life, working life...social life...evrything. Like i had said to most........I will be GLADLY happi...wen Im surrounded by my loved ones....on THAT DAY. :D

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Loving memory of my Love...Grandmother

100 days after my grdfthr left us all....and 4hrs after we send her off to airport for CHINA trip holiday, my dearest Grdmtr (GM) whom we love sooo much..went away foreva. A shocking BUT true event. It was a seriously shock event for me n my family...

At 930pm...headed off to GM’s house..fetch her n my aunt. Took pics under de block..laugh2 here n der...we headed off to Airport..where we waited for few hrs. Chit chat...laugh n laugh...and take pics..its like evryting was SOOOOO super super happy day. N to c my GM so cheery and lively...was reali someting pleasing. She seriously look very bright and sooo nice.

De flight took off at 2am…and dey went in at 12am. We den headed homey…and 4hrs after all dat…got woken up by a call frm aunt saying dat GM had collapsed and flight to china had detour to Bangkok for emergency landing. And a short mmt after dat…..we got a msg….saying my GM had passed away. Shocking and Unexpected.

I thanked GOD dat her body was able to be brought back to spore on de day itself…which eventually reach my home at 1.30am…and we had to stay awake de whole night..reciting prayers for her. Its like taking turns until..me and Kak Ima and Mom cant take it..which we eventually fall asleep abt 3am+. So de guys…My bro, Dad and Ayg…stayed up..till morning.

We just met her up few hrs back…and it happens so fast dat she left us all. She was supposed to stay at my place after she came back from China…but it all didn’t happen. N I still have her pics in my hp de day we were on de way to de airport…but guess it will jus be staying in my hp for memories. Not to be published at all... I rmbred about wat I had planned out for her wen she stays with us….cook dishes and all dat…but Im glad she managed to eat my first n last dish I cooked for her..where she ate it in de airport…and it was MAGGI GORENG.

N de most touching thing was…she alwys says she wants to stay at our place…dun matter where she will be placed..she can sleep at de living room…ad de kitchen..as long as she stays with us...which of coz we wldnt placed her on such areas. plan to stay over after china..although we pestered her to come b4 dat…she refused. N to c her body placed on our living room….seriously saddens de whole thing where its like….she IS sleeping der. And not oni dat…..Her burial lot number was also OUR BLOCK NUMBER. How coincidence can dat be. Its like…she want to stay here so much…bt guess…der are some things related to us after she passed.

But b4 all dis…der were signs…which oni can be seen after all this had happen. Kept saying abt my late grdfather…EVRY SINGLE TIME we met. N like most ppl say..She LOVES my grdftr sooo bad..dat wen he left…she felt VERY lonely. Seriously we din expect it to be dis fast.

Alhamdullilah..all went well….till her burial process. Few days had gone..but weneva I tink of her….I still cry..coz Im soo close to her…she take care of me n bro eva since we were young..and to see her off in a shocking way. Dats seriously sads me…but Seriously to be honest…WE WERE REALI REALI in a happi mode…on dat airport day. Its like….my GM wans to see us cheery n happi…b4 she went away. Having us entertaining her…on her last day.

The impact is sooo deep….dat I cant get over it so soon. Guess it will take a very long time….A petite…loving grdmother…whom I dearly LOVE. Semoga roh datuk2 and nenek2 ku..dirahmati ALLAH dan ditempatkan di golongan org2 yg beriman. AMIN~

Lastly, wanna thnked you guys who have come…who have send me warm wishes and called me up to ask abt hw im coping. Realli appreciate it all. I couldn’t thanked you enough. Hanya ALLAH sahaja …dpt membalasnye.

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Neutral Feeling

Guess life is pretty much the same....evry now n den. Some ppl ask de same question as to whether I had gotten a job. But wat can i say....de OBVIOUS answer is NO...i haven get a job yet. Hah...guess no company wants me at dis mmt. From being enthusiastic in going for interviews...till I seriously had NO mood to talk abt it. I seriously dun even want to talk abt any interviews I went or watsoeva. Guess....it came up to me dat...Evrytime i tel ppl..abt interviews..abt hw i did on interviews..and all eventually make me wait for A MONTH..and having NO response..make it all drained out. N evrytime I had plans to do Part time jobs..der will be call for interviews..and I had to wait for results.. Hah. So....im jus gonna stay Numb. With or without interviews....I shall jus be silent...until SOMEONE eventually say.." YOU"RE HIRED!" hahah.. so lets wait for DAT day.

Besides dat...I also learn to be silent in stuffs i did. Coz i guess....certain things are not meant to be heard or spoken in public. guess....close ones wld knw wats up or wats coming up with my life. Coz at dis mmt, I tend to jus be silent...Too much talking leads to something u dun want to happen. Hah. Lessons learnt. But its ok...its nvr too late to change.

But every sad/irritated mmts in our lives...will sometimes be reduced by someone special in ur heart. I seriously appreciate wat You did for me dat time...wen i seriously was in an EMERGENCY state. haha! N being der for me wen Im down...makes me feel better...nt forgetting my lovely family who alwys der to support wat i did.

These few days...had been a lil rough for me...with new news..and updates abt certain things. Emotions up n down...and guess...someone knws hw to lighten it up..even with a simple sentence early morning. As most knw...hw He is..he is not someone who says mushy2 stuffs like ME. hahah..and to have such thing early morning..reali make my day up. Even if he may nt be here in person...those words are enough for me n him to knw.

Nwys...life must goes on..Lets just wait..and I reali hope ALLAH will grant my prayers soon. InsyaALLAH....AMIN~ Also prayers to my frens...may dey alwys be in a fine happy life and lovely ppl ard dem. :)

P.S: I wanna be like SITI~!!! hahaha..ook random...ignore me. heheheh...

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Messed up?? Dun tink so....

It was a weird feeling...an unexpected feeling..as well as funny feeling for her. After what she had said...it so called ended up the way she din expect it to be. But she was fine with it...just dat she was a lil disturbed by de fact that 'A' did dat due to de specific reason which eventually makes her feel confused. Who is she to 'A'?? Weird feeling....but nvm..she let it be..since like wat 'A' says..there is no otr choices. She is fine...as long as de ones she needed are der.

Its weird...Now she knows whats up with de many surveys and questionnaires. Its merely anther reason...and not jus for enquiries. Its ok...oni some wld knw who are de one stating it first. She is fine...just dat she was a lil upset..coz its confusing with such statement. She dun blamed 'A'....coz she herslf dunno whats in de mind. Hah!

Though its not fully choppies....she just have to wait. Once its being 'stamped'....guess its de next step ahead. Hmmm....seriously, she was nt expecting dis. She mainly pick carefully...as to NOT interupt certain things but nw its vice versa. hah! Its Ok...its Ok...SHe is fine...Just a lil tinge of curiosity.

From nw on....she shall just keep numb. Better dis way....den expose all and to be treated in such a way. Even if its nt gonna happen..which she wont knw...it gives a mark dat she is NOT someone whom she thinks she is to 'A". But wateva it is.....LESS EXPOSURE IS ALWYS BETTER.... :)

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Special for US with an irritating touch...

After few mths of waiting....we eventually got a letter from de HDB...to come down to pick our flat unit. ALHAMDULLILAH....we got de first few queue number...and eventually get to pick the unit we wanted. heheh... actuali Ayg did de choosing of level...n me de unit number itself. heheh...

Since we had to be der tday....at noon..and since Ayg jus came back from his nite shift...so we ended up meeting in de morning...w/o him resting at all. Must be seriously tiring for him..bt wat to do...we cnt chge de date. Nwys...got our queue tix...and off we went in...

De lady din explain to us anything..and jus jump abt which units we wanted. N after dat...she ask for our ICs and ask for de payslips..which of coz..WE din have all of it..since we were not even told to bring de related ones for de housing grants. N as for me....i have NONE....since im not even wking. So exception. N she was soooo rude..kept asking us to fold our payslips..and seriously tink we were kids..and told us..so rudely. FOLD FOLD FOLD! like..HELLO....shdnt YOU be doin it...n NOT us. She kept on repeating which mths were nt der OVER n OVER again...and show her irritated face coz she had to zap de payslips and all.

Ok...ppl who knows me..wld knw i wnt get pissed easily. But de way she treated us...make me...stared at her..and at de same time...make an irritated voice and i tink she knws IM angry...which eventually she TRIED to act nicely..but tooo bad. it doesnt help. She is totaly of NO USE. Din explain to us ANYTHING. its like..she expect us to knw all....bt HELLO..we are FIRST TIMERS. u shd tel us step by step....BUt NOOOOOOO.....she jus ask us to sign n sign n sign..and dint even say anything or explain. N we had to read it...n LUCKY we had more or less knw wats goin on. EVen de financial areas..she din even say abt it.

She basically say in a hurry mode...dis n dat..like as if she is lazy to entertain us. Or maybe coz its LUNCH time...N not only dat. Rudely throw de paper on de table....like someone giving u something in a rude manner like..NAH...take it. Hmph!! So basically.....its like..YOU dun even have a chance to ask her. Nwys, I dun even bthr to ask....N Ayg knws wen Im pissed...i seriously cldnt be bothered at all. I wonder if she treat such ways to otr young couples....like as if we are sooo naive.

The first ting came up my mind...is COMPLAIN. hahah..yeah..maybe its Normal of ppl to do so. But guess in dis case...since I had otr issues to take into consideration...i need to do it. Hahah...and for Ayg to agree with it...sets me up ahead..coz he is Not someone who wld be bothered to complain if its nt important. N ya...n seriously hope dey do smthing abt it.....

Nwys....looking at de bright side....Im glad dat de unit was already been booked..and i cant wait for de future. InsyaALLAH...all be fine. heheh..... :D

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Wats up next??

I knw I have not been updating my blog since dunno when. Guess cos there is nothing much happening in my life dis days. heheh...Been slacking at homey all day long except if going out with my parents or my frens.

Past week had been my "Missing" mode with Ayg. Padahal nvr mit him for oni a week. Yati crappie...i know~! hahahah... wat to do. Im just a GERL. heheh.. N am soooo glad dat he actualli took leave tmrw as to be able to spend time tgther de whole day. whee~!! hadnt been goin out like dat since dunno when. So cant wait for tmrw...to go out..basically coz he wants to SHOP~! Boring...Me no shop2x...me follow shop2x oni. hehehe...Den maybe chill out somewhere after dat. Best! Airport maybe?! heheh...

Oh..saw de updates in de web. Cant wait for the time...guess it will be called up within dis period of time. hmm....aftr all de days we waited de past mth...its gonna be announced by dis mth. I HOPE!! hahaha. Had picked dem up..had seen de plans...so now to be able to achieve it. So let de day awaits. wooo hoo~!!

Also..wanna thnked Bth Abg n Kak Ima for de sponsorship. wheee~!! thnkies2x so much. so dat have been booked. One more major thing to take note...den off for de little2 stuffs. heheh...Seriously gonna have a lot of MINUS signs wen i started working. haha...

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A dream which she hopes it will come true...
Something which she reali look forward to...
A future....based on Both....
Guess dat feeling in de dream...wld apply to reality...
Hopefully...it will...
InsyaALLAH....
Cant wait for THE day... :D